Elizabeth Adolphi
Bio
As a child I had a flair for the dramatic; as an adult, the flair has turned into a subtle, yet continuous hum. I love to see the world through different scopes and to tell stories based on the takeaway. Cheers!
Stories (19/0)
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 10
Hello once again! I gather I left Part 9 as a type of cliff-hanger since it has been several years since I wrote it. To those who have followed that story, I give my sincerest apologies. I was not in a good mental place to continue my story and I needed time to become okay again. So, nearly four years later, I am in a good place and can continue sharing my story.
By Elizabeth Adolphi2 years ago in Families
Heartstrings of Siblings
When I was a little girl, I thought having four older (half) sisters was the coolest fact about me, especially when they lived in a different state than I did. I would dream about hanging out with them, being one of them, and sharing secrets. Over the years as I grew in knowledge of the real world, it became painfully clear to me that my dreams were simply my hopes manifest and would rarely cross over into reality. To be fair, I can't blame my sisters entirely; I was a pain in the butt as a child. On the rare occasions I did see them, I would chase after them to tell them to stop smoking because it would kill them. I didn't know how to say, "dad won't let me hang out with you when you smoke," so it came out as me being a little priss.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 9
As I was working on homework tonight, the swirl of emotions filled me to the point where I realized I desperately needed to work on this next part of my story. Then I realized how school, work, my photography, and my sister's wedding planning put writing on the back-burner. So, without further ado, here I go!
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
What Does Love Look Like?
Love is a bit of a strange topic for me to write about since I have never been "in love" before. Sure, I've had the usual crushes, a date, and rejections, but I don't know what "love" is supposed to look like these days. The world has become confused as to what "love" is; I have never thought it was that icky feeling in one's gut when you stare into someone's eyes, because that feeling is fleeting and love is supposed to last a lifetime. "Love," according to what the media throws our way, is all about the sexual gratification that comes with being with the one you're attracted to. "Love" is about sharing a physically intimate part of one's self with multiple people while withholding the truly intimate part: your inner vulnerability, your past, your dreams, your needs, your life plan, your hidden passions (as in hobbies), etc. After watching so many of my friends and family members settle down over the years, I have made it a point to observe what kind of "love" they have.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Humans
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 8
Wow. That is about all I can say when I looked and saw how long it has been since I last shared Part 7. I will eventually get to why it took so long, but suffice enough to say it had to do with my dad's health problems as well as a surgery my mom underwent (both are fine right now, though!). The first order of business I wish to tackle is to explain my subtitle: "A Chemically-Forced Submission in a Self-Absorbed World." I believe in the commandment to honor one's father and mother; to me, that is to be respectful, serve them with love, and submit to them regardless of one's age. By "submit," I mean there are times when their needs are greater than my own and, out of love, I put my needs in a "later" box. Note how I say the word "love" and not include "respect." There are not a lot of moments where I respect my dad after all that has happened, but I do respect him as a fellow human being as as the person who sired me. Agent Orange required me to put my needs on "pause" so early in life, long before I had the maturity to understand, that it felt like a forced submission. Only in recent years have I learned how to not have it be forced, but done in kindness and love.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 7
Somehow it does not feel as if it has been a week since I last posted. A lot has gone on and frankly, I needed a breather from travelling back through my own timeline — as in Doctor Who, travelling one's own timeline is a dangerous game. Remembering all that I have for this story has stirred up feelings I never thought I would feel again. This past week I have been angry with my dad as I have not been in several years, probably since I was in Texas.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 6
Later this week my dad will be going into surgery to fix a problem caused by him not following post-surgery orders nearly a year ago (that is a chapter all on its own!). With this surgery looming on the horizon, I keep thinking about my past as his daughter. I see how far I have come since I left for England six years ago on the 22nd of January. Those six months were exactly what I needed; they allowed me to grow as an adult in a way I never would have experienced if I had stayed home. For the first time I was able to go where I wanted whenever I wanted without parental permission or explaining why I was leaving. I walked nearly everywhere in Newcastle and felt like one of the locals most of the time (except for when I opened my mouth to speak). Being in such a beautiful city with lovely people, I was free to detox from all the years of negativity. My study abroad group went on several excursions and aside from those, I visited a few places on my own. The countryside of Scotland was by far my favorite; I lost myself in the rolling hills dotted with sheep. I admit I was scared the first time I went to a new town all on my own with no form of backup, but that fear was simply because I had never been given the gift of exploration as a child. Once I found out I could travel on my own in a foreign country, my wings took off and my spirit soared.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 5
Part four was probably seen as a bit harsh, especially towards those outside my immediate family—it is how I viewed life at that time and remember, I was only a teenager. I did not have the maturity that I have now for better observation skills and discernment. In my emotionally wild teen years I was harsh and quick with my judgments and unforgiving with what I saw through those skewed eyes. I know there are things said and done that I have never been told about where people stood by dad and my family—as I said, as a teenager I was not the best person to share things with because of how quickly I would jump to the wrong judgmental conclusion. I do not apologize for what I wrote, but I want my readers to understand that is not who I am anymore; I lived what I lived, but I have grown past who I used to be.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families
Introducing: Lucy and Molly
As I am sitting at the kitchen table with Pandora playing my favorite music, I cannot help but contemplate where my life has taken me to. I could regret choices unmade or decisions made in haste, but every moment has led me to where I am. I have been led to typing at the table with the most adorable Yorkshire terrier sleeping soundly on the chair next to me and a boxer mix who likes to sleep on the spare bed starting at dark time.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Petlife
Life as a Daughter of Agent Orange, Part 4
Well, after that previous part, I guess we are all still here! I never thought in a million years I would be sharing my story, let alone some intimate parts of how I dealt with the stress and upheaval. I know what I have gone through is for a purpose and a reason, but there are days and moments when I wish I could take a magic wand and make it all better. My late teens to early 20's were the years where I would wish that the most. During my last two years of high school, dad's side effects grew evermore fierce. It was getting to the point where he could not be in large crowds because just a tiny whiff of the wrong chemical makeup would cause his blood pressure to change dramatically and it would take a couple of days for his body to go back to normal (including his moods). Trying to get dad to come to my band and choir concerts was a chore on its own; I knew he could not handle the smells, but I still needed my dad there. The few he did not attend I spent the night watching and waiting for him to step into the gym's doorway (he would always stand in the lobby to be away from the smells) and my heart would sink when he never showed. My mom always came and later I found out that my desire to see dad there overshadowed what mom was doing; she was showing me she was there as both parents and did not receive thanks for it until years later. When it came to high school graduation, I flat out told my dad he would be there. In my mind if he did not attend, he was not proud of me. You could say I had a bit of Stockholm Syndrome at that time in my life; I thought I simply desired his approval, but I think it was more than that—I was trying to be who I thought he wanted me to be.
By Elizabeth Adolphi6 years ago in Families