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The Love Languages of Dogs

How They Know You Love Them, and How You Know They Love You

By Lucas BrooksPublished 5 years ago 4 min read
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I have been working as a dog-walker for only a few months. I have always been a diehard dog fanatic, but through my work life, I've been introduced to a broader range of canine personalities than I even knew existed before. Growing up with a Golden Retriever mix, I became used to the idea that all dogs flipped out with glee at the mention of a W-A-L-K, died and went to Heaven (metaphorically speaking) at dinner time, and couldn't wait 'til the next time they got to lick your face.

It did not take me long to learn that this is not the case.

If fact, a lot of my clients are quite the contrary. A great many are surprisingly indifferent when I show up and slip their leash on, if not sternly resistant (which I much confess, hurts my feelings a little). As I've gotten to know my clients over time, I've come to understand their more unique needs and how to make our time together more pleasant and efficient.

My personal theory is that dogs, like humans, have a set of five Love Languages, or ways they prefer to express and receive affection. Some of them are very similar to ours (Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and Physical Touch), but manifest in slightly different ways.

Quality Time

Dogs are famous for their companionship. It's why most of us choose to share our homes with them. They, of course, also have their own needs for love and attention, which is pretty much the reason my job exists. These needs vary from dog to dog. Some want to get out and explore the world (or at least, the nearest park) with a dear human friend. Some would rather lie close to you while you work from home, watch TV, or what have you. Ultimately, they want to be a part of your life, and have you be a part of theirs, so making sure they feel included is an absolute necessity for (almost) every dog.

Playtime

Some might challenge me on this being a separate category from "Quality Time," but I divided these areas up very intentionally. See, I have a client, a young Golden Retriever with a seemingly-infinite supply of energy... who doesn't particularly like to walk. Sometimes she just stops, sits, stares off into the distance, and won't budge. I've found that when this happens, the best thing I can do is whip out a ball or a stick, and suddenly "SNAP! The job's a game!" I get nervous walking her with other dogs because she won't want to walk. Just wrestle. I've become accustomed to bringing a toy along on our walk to keep her motivated and I roughhouse with her a little when I drop her off, to give her the kind of affection she needs and understands.

Treats

I have yet to meet a single dog that doesn't love a treat—or five. Some of them, though, really love them. Like everything they do is motivated by acquiring some form of noms. On the other hand, some are extremely selective with where, or whom, said noms come from. I know a Rottweiler who stops dead in her tracks anytime you reach into a pocket to retrieve literally anything, and remains in a state of disbelief that you didn't mean to pull out a snack for her for nearly a minute at a time. (She will also eat just about anything off the ground that is within reach.) Meanwhile, I also know a feisty Shih-Tzu who I have tried to woo with treats on many occasions and she looks at me like I'm trying to poison her. There's just no pleasing some pups.

Physical Affection

I, for one, am a very touchy-feely person, so my first instinct when I meet a dog is to PUT MY HANDS ALL OVER THEIR FLUFFY FACES AND SCRATCH THEIR BUMS AND TELL THEM HOW SOFT AND GORGEOUS THEY ARE. For some dogs, this is wholly desirable. Some simply tolerate it. And others run away. Which is fair, however disappointing. For an assortment of reasons related to personalities, past experiences, etc., some pups just don't want to be touched—at least not right away. I've learned to squelch my squishy instincts and gauge the situation before I attack them with pats and snuggles.

Being Left the F*** Alone

I have often asked one of my clients, an aging Australian Shepherd mix, on many occasions: "Why bother being a dog if you're just going to be a cat?" Everyday when I show up at her house, she looks at me as if to say, "Oh... you again..." She is actually quite cooperative and obedient once we get out the door, but she maintains a solid side-eye for the full 20 minutes, making it quite clear she would prefer to be plopped back on her couch (more days than not, I can completely relate). An antisocial canine, and a mutt nonetheless, was a concept that I needed some time to adjust to, but this particular dog and I have learned to tolerate each other's existence, and do what we have to do in order to return to our respective homes as quickly as possible.

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About the Creator

Lucas Brooks

Professional Intellectual Homosexual.

Writer. Performer. Educator. Too eclectic to function.

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