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Good Boys Deserve Good Pay: PETA Protests Latest All-Dog Musical over Unfair Pay

"How do we know that these so-called 'owners' are spending the money how the animal wants? No dog should be forced to share their income with a human just because they live together."

By Ray PluiePublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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Peaches, the St. Bernard during the opening number.

Victoria, BC—The evenings are still warm in Victoria, BC and citizens are still roaming the downtown core looking for entertainment and a good time.

As such, the local theatre is eager to promote a new all-dogs musical: Kinky Snoots. The production has garnered interest from around the world, but not all of it good. Most have called the production adorable, charming, and worthy of many pets—but one activist group has been outside the doors of the theatre advocating for this latest show to hit the dog house.

PETA (People for Ethical Treatment of Animals) have been camping in front of the box office advocating that the animals inside have not been paid equitably within the production.

"They are paying the pet minders, but not the animals," activist Marilyn Trout stated. Marilyn, 36, spent the weekend with a picket sign that read, "Every Dog Needs His Pay."

"It isn't fair. How do we know that these so-called 'owners' are spending the money how the animal wants? No dog should be forced to share their income with a human just because they live together."

The production staff have been trying to negotiate with the animals, but it's recently turned sour.

Adrien Shaw, director for the show, recently tweeted that it's been hard to discuss the pay agreement with activists because there is some misunderstanding.

"The animals are provided with treats and toys onset and we attempt to engage them in conversations about how they are feeling about the work, but...they don't exactly speak the same language as we do."

When pressed for further clarity on that statement, Shaw simply stated, "They are dogs. They don't speak English."

Activists found that comment to be offensive.

"I have a Siberian Husky at home that can say 'I love you' and 'bork' who would find this generalization deeply hurtful." One activist claimed. "He would probably struggle to articulate that offense through English, but that's just because it's an inferior language."

Some PETA activists tried to open dialogue with the production team by shouting questions at them as they came to and from the theatre. Most crew members failed to comment, but others shouted back that it was the activists that weren't thinking of the dogs best interests.

"Having so many people outside really stresses the animals out and causes stage fright. They just want to perform their craft to the best of their abilities, but being used as the token animals in this struggle for equality has been deeply troubling for most of the actors." One crew member stated, "Kinky Snoots has done so much for the dog unemployment rate in this town, but I haven't seen any activists mention that."

The officials behind the musical expect it to continue despite PETA's presence and encourage locals and tourists alike to see the production themselves to understand the mindset of the actors involved.

"The best way to understand how these dogs are feeling is to see this show and watch them pour their heart and bowl into the story. It's a heart-warming celebration of acceptance and there is no better time than now to see such an uplifting performance."

When speaking with Victoria locals, many offered remarks like Mark Townes, Victoria resident for 25 years:

"I don't understand. The dogs don't have bank accounts...?"

The production will continue until October 13th.

We reached out to actors in the cast, but they did not offer a bark or comment at this time.

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The above is a not-so-clever satire as submitted on September 29, 2018 by Raynaldo Parks.

Follow Raynaldo on Twitter or find him petting all of the good boys at your local humane society.

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About the Creator

Ray Pluie

Biologically human.

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