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Pets After Babies

Helping your furry friends adapt to your new bundle of joy.

By Deidre SimpsonPublished 6 years ago 4 min read
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Hank and Lauren spending quality tummy time together. 

“We will love our pups regardless of a new baby and they will still get devoted attention.” That was my motto as I neared the last month of my pregnancy. I probably said it as a ritualistic reminder each day, because of the changes we were about to endure. I had always heard people say your pups that you’ve loved and doted on so much will just be “dogs” once your baby arrives. I called bull on that each and every time someone brought it up, that is, until my daughter was born.

The day I went into labor, I had spent the day uncomfortable and cuddled with my pups on the couch, not knowing I was in labor all day. I wanted to get as much time with them as possible before my scheduled C-section. I knew there were going to be a few days away from them and then I’d be bringing home another human for them to relearn. I was terrified to leave them and have them think I was replacing them. When we first brought Lauren home, all 10 lb, 7oz of her, she seemed so tiny compared to the dogs. They loved her immediately and followed me everywhere I went with her. After a few days though, I began to feel annoyed at them and wouldn’t let them sit with us out of pure frustration. They weren’t waking Lauren up much when they barked, but I was overwhelmed. This tiny human needed my undivided attention and I was having a hard time balancing new motherhood and loving on each dog as much as they deserved. I broke down countless times, especially when Hank, our lab, climbed on the chair opposite of me and touched his paw to my hand while I held my sleeping baby. I lost it, and he never moved his paw away. That was when it hit me, I had no idea how to transition them, or me, into our new lives together. I was so laser focused on the baby that I wasn’t paying them attention. Sure, they had food and water, but not the love they were accustomed to. I sat thinking, “How am I supposed to do this?” My dogs deserved more, they had been there through every step of my previous miscarriages, every tear and every time I’d lose it and cry uncontrollably. They were my rock. I couldn’t let them down.

So I made a change. I began to let my husband or the swing take care of the baby for a few minutes when she was happy and I’d take turns holding, loving and doting on each puppy. I gave them a few extra treats and I even let them pick out one toy from the nursery that was the baby’s toy (small, cheap fabric rattles, etc). They loved anything that smelled like Lauren. They would play with their new toys and bring them to Lauren for her to play with when she would cry. I began to also let them sit with us during tummy time. I had been so scared that they might hurt her before that we would lock them out of the room and they’d all be sitting around the door when we were done to check on the baby. It was heartbreaking. Once they began doing tummy time with her, she began laughing at them and playing and they would roll over for her to scratch their bellies. They loved their little human as much as I loved her and all of them. They will sit beside her during diaper changes, bring her toys when she’s sad, wait beside her when she’s eating so they can get a lick or a scrap of food. More importantly they feel loved by her and by us again. They are her protectors. They have no resentment now for her, and they feel as if she’s their own. Take it from me, you can make or break their relationship. You have to decide what’s more important and stay laser focused on what your goal is.

Step 1: allow the dogs to smell her, without putting her in danger, and let them have something of hers, but nothing sentimental.

Step 2: show them love! Take a break to pet and play for a minute. I promise the baby will be fine in her swing for a minute.

Step 3: introduce them during play time slowly. Teach them their boundaries around her and reward good behavior.

Step 4: be sure they know you’re the alpha. They have to know who dominates and have to be able to obey you.

Step 5: let your baby touch them softly. No hair pulling or biting. Let them get accustomed to the dogs so that they can grow closer and not have fear of them. Teach your dog to allow the baby to be close by. IF YOUR DOG SEEMS UNCOMFORTABLE OR SHOWS ANY SIGNS OF AGGRESSION—STOP RIGHT AWAY. You may need to do some training classes and slowly introduce them again later on.

In the end, trust your gut and know that you CAN love your dogs and babies at the same time!

Hank, Smith, and Wesson keeping watch on the sleeping baby

Hank loves being silly!

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